Courtney (MW reader) asks…
Hey Jen! I grew up with a disabled father who was in a wheelchair my entire life. As a result I have always felt strongly about teaching my children that just because someone is using special equipment to help them get around, such as a wheelchair, they are no different than anyone else.
What is the appropriate age to begin discussing with your children the physical and mental differences amongst individuals?
Hey Courtney!
In my opinion, from the moment a child is born, he or she should be introduced to the diversity that exists in this world, whether it's his or her own differences, a family members or a stranger. I am not a parent, but I am an Auntie to six beautiful nieces and nephews. All of them, but one, were exposed to their quadriplegic Auntie from the day they were born.
When paralysis hit my world, like most, I had a difficult time accepting the fact that I had lost the ability to do certain things in my life and be as independent as I always had been before, especially regarding my role as Auntie. At the time, I had a 4-year-old nephew who was my little buddy. I would regularly take the day off of work and pick him up so we could have a play date, just the two of us; but then I became a quadriplegic. Some of the losses I endured were the use of my arms, fingers and the ability to walk, so I couldn't get in my car and just pick my nephew up anymore or even be alone with him for long periods of time.
I was left with a void and many questions. How could I be that same Auntie as I had been prior to my paralysis? Would my nephew ever look at me again with that excitement in his eyes, the way he always had? How would he handle the wheelchair, the brace that stabilized my neck, which all made me feel so different? I was an adult, and I was confused. How would this young child understand and deal with this life-altering change? It was difficult being in the hospital, in that condition, and imagining how the first visit would go in a positive manner. It seemed nearly impossible.
When paralysis hit my world, like most, I had a difficult time accepting the fact that I had lost the ability to do certain things in my life and be as independent as I always had been before, especially regarding my role as Auntie. At the time, I had a 4-year-old nephew who was my little buddy. I would regularly take the day off of work and pick him up so we could have a play date, just the two of us; but then I became a quadriplegic. Some of the losses I endured were the use of my arms, fingers and the ability to walk, so I couldn't get in my car and just pick my nephew up anymore or even be alone with him for long periods of time.
I was left with a void and many questions. How could I be that same Auntie as I had been prior to my paralysis? Would my nephew ever look at me again with that excitement in his eyes, the way he always had? How would he handle the wheelchair, the brace that stabilized my neck, which all made me feel so different? I was an adult, and I was confused. How would this young child understand and deal with this life-altering change? It was difficult being in the hospital, in that condition, and imagining how the first visit would go in a positive manner. It seemed nearly impossible.
![]() |
Jenny with her niece and nephew |
HE HUGGED ME...MY NEPHEW HUGGED ME LIKE HE ALWAYS HAD BEFORE MY PARALYSIS!
All those fears and the anxiety I had about his reaction were for no reason. He loved his Auntie unconditionally and the future only solidified it. From the beginning, he always sat on my lap, whether we were going to the park, a happy meal and the playground at McDonald's, turning up the stereo for a spur of the moment dance party at home or a day at the mall, which always turned into nap-time on my lap at the end of the day. As he grew up and my lap wasn't such a perfect fit anymore, he began standing on the back of my electric wheelchair and holding onto the arm handles as we cruised along.
I was looking online for some great children's books related to disabilities and inclusion to share with my nieces and nephews when I realized that there were many books out there relating to social issues and disabilities that children face and struggle with on a daily basis, even more than we realize. Amazon.com is a great website to find and purchase books related to disabilities. I found books relating to Autism, speech impairments, Tourette’s Syndrome, race differences, cerebral palsy, divorce, and disabilities in general, just to name a few. Plus, you can look at what ages or grade level each book leans towards.
Of course, as a parent, you'll know if something is not appropriate for your child at their age level or if it’s a book they can grow into. I find that sometimes, with younger children, you can improvise if needed. The point is that you are opening those little minds up to help them feel comfortable in real life scenarios, such as day care, school, the grocery store or the park, to be accepting of others who may look a little different and, most of all, encourage them to ask questions.
Here is one book that was recommended to me and that I found not only to be educational, but it also left a positive and appropriate message. I was also able to relate to this book in my own life.
"Mama Zooms," written and illustrated by Jane Cowen-Fletcher, really touched my heart because it reminds me of my interaction with my nieces and nephews. I haven’t had the opportunity to share it with them yet, but I’ll improvise it to fit our lives by calling it “Auntie Zooms.”
I found this book to be a great learning and teaching book for not only the child, but a parent themselves who uses a wheelchair. With imagination mixed with his real-life scenarios, this little boy sits on his wheelchair-using mother's lap and imagines himself as a racing jockey, a ship captain at sea, a race car driver, an airplane pilot, a train engineer and an astronaut, all the while the extraordinary key to the whole story revolves around his Mama's zooming machine, her wheelchair, that transports them everyday to work, school and play. This book uses imagination in a way every child displays their curiosity and engages their minds on a daily basis, but the remarkable example is that it is preparing them for their future. The pencil illustrations capture the detailed costumes and facial expressions in every adventure in a way that is so detailed you and your child will feel as if you are "zooming" right along with the author, so articulately drawn that you see the joy in the mother and son's faces in every scene.
![]() |
Jenny and her niece |
The first photo you see in this article is from Thanksgiving 2010. I am holding my 3-week-old nephew and my 2-year-old niece, his big sister, is standing on the footrests to my wheelchair. We were discussing sharing and that we had to take turns sitting on Auntie's lap. It was hard for her to understand at first that she had to share that space with her new baby brother, because for the majority of her life, she was the only one sitting on Auntie’s lap. We all know how change can confuse and disrupt a child, but on this day she accepted that fact and was willing to share her Auntie with her baby brother.
The second photo shows my 2-year-old niece helping me apply my make-up.
Overall, I want to highly express that when we are faced with questionable and challenging real-life experiences, we must keep in mind our children are as well. Instead of sugar-coating them, we need to face them head on, because if we are questioning them, our children are too. You know, as a parent, to what degree your children will understand certain topics or if something is going to be way too personal for them at that time in their life or age level. Use your parental instincts and these topics will become great social advantages for your children, whether it's school today or a workplace tomorrow. I have learned, especially through adversity, how resilient, honest and accepting our children really are. They could teach us adults a thing or two!
Remember, nothing is too personal in my book, so send your questions to “Hey Jen!” at: mobileHeyJen@gmail.com! Learn more about me and my story at my website: www.InspirationSpeaks.Me.
Overall, I want to highly express that when we are faced with questionable and challenging real-life experiences, we must keep in mind our children are as well. Instead of sugar-coating them, we need to face them head on, because if we are questioning them, our children are too. You know, as a parent, to what degree your children will understand certain topics or if something is going to be way too personal for them at that time in their life or age level. Use your parental instincts and these topics will become great social advantages for your children, whether it's school today or a workplace tomorrow. I have learned, especially through adversity, how resilient, honest and accepting our children really are. They could teach us adults a thing or two!
Remember, nothing is too personal in my book, so send your questions to “Hey Jen!” at: mobileHeyJen@gmail.com! Learn more about me and my story at my website: www.InspirationSpeaks.Me.
The little boy on the back of the wheelchair sure loves his auntie Jemny!!!!
ReplyDeletethomas sabo uk
ReplyDeletemichael kors handbags
swarovski jewelry
tiffany jewelry
michael kors handbags
mac cosmetics
new balance
louis vuitton outlet
air jordan 4
foamposite galaxy
oakley sunglasses wholesale
ed hardy clothing
polo ralph lauren outlet
mcm bags
fitflop sandals
ray ban sunglasses uk
true religion jeans
puma shoes
valentino sale
nfl jerseys
celine outlet online
m a c cosmetics
ray ban sunglasses
louis vuitton handbags
tory burch handbags
coach factory outlet
abercrombie outlet
ray ban aviator sunglasses
coach outlet
ferragamo belts
coach outlet store online
michael kors outlet
jordan 4
prada shoes
louis vuitton handbags
timberland shoes
hollister pas cher
tod's sale
nhl jerseys wholesale
kate spade handbags
longchamp outlet
ReplyDeleteburberry outlet online
cheap nike shoes
tory burch outlet
celine outlet online
ferragamo shoes
kate spade handbags
oakley sunglasses
minnesota vikings jerseys
new england patriots jerseys
hermes birkin
chicago bears jerseys
dallas cowboys jersey
michael kors outlet
mbt shoes
adidas outlet
swarovski jewelry
washington redskins jerseys
coach outlet online
tory burch outlet online
nike free 5.0
hollister clothing
cheap oakley sunglasses
valentino outlet
michael kors outlet
ysl outlet
coach outlet
hollister clothing
ed hardy t-shirts
lebron james shoes
valentino shoes
true religion outlet
new orleans saints jerseys
cheap oakley sunglasses
mulberry outlet
coach outlet store online
cheap nba jerseys
monster beats
air max 2015
lululemon
cleveland cavaliers jersey
ReplyDeletegolden state warriors jerseys
mbt shoes
chanel handbags
los angeles lakers jerseys
nike free
dallas cowboys jersey
washington redskins jerseys
arizona cardinals jerseys
kansas city chiefs jerseys
atlanta falcons jersey
nike air max uk
green bay packers jerseys
hermes belt
nike outlet store
barcelona jersey
tory burch outlet
chicago blackhawks jersey
nike huarache
michael kors uk
mulberry outlet
manchester united jersey
new england patriots jerseys
oklahoma city thunder jerseys
baltimore ravens jerseys
michael kors uk
ray ban sunglasses
nike roshe
cheap football shirts
nike trainers
air max 2014
stuart weitzman boots
the north face jackets
nike free 5.0
coach outlet canada
nike free uk
denver broncos jerseys
new york knicks jersey
oakland raiders jerseys
san antonio spurs jerseys
wei20150617
louis vuitton handbags
ReplyDeleteoakley sunglasses
fake watches
louis vuitton handbags
nba jerseys
coach factory outlet
michael kors handbags
coach outlet
timberland canada
ray ban sunglasses
toms shoes outlet
louis vuitton
kate spade diaper bag
ralph lauren outlet
hollister kids
jordan 13s
michael kors
mont blanc legend
tory burch outlet online
michael kors outlet online sale
louis vuitton handbags uk
ed hardy clothing outlet
ed hardy outlet store
coach outlet online
kobe bryant shoes for kids
oakley outlet
louis vuitton handbags
copy watches
cheap toms shoes
fendi bags
coco chanel
coach outlet
pandora rings
insanity workout
longchamp sale
true religion
20150710xiong
2015-10-6leilei
ReplyDeleteJordan Concords Low And High
coach outlet online
Christian Louboutin Outlet Sale Cheap Online
Cheap Ray Ban Wayfarer
Oakley Polarized Sunglasses Cheap Outlet Store
uggs sale
Louis Vuitton Purses For Cheap
Authentic Air Jordan 13 shoes for sale
canada goose sale
Nike Kobe Bryant Basketball Shoes
Authentic Louis Vuitton Bags Discount
Hollister Tees for Men
ralph lauren
hollister clothing
Jordan 8 Phoenix Suns
Outlet Michael Kors Handbags
Designer Louis Vuitton Bags Discount
michael kors bags
michael kors uk
Michael Kors Handbags Clearance Outlet
tory burch sale
Michael Kors Outlet Sale Handbags Discount
canada goose
michael kors uk
Louis Vuitton Outlet Stores Usa